Category: Legacy

How Daily and Weekly Reviews Are Changing My Life

Jackie2 Comments

Life moves fast.

Now that I’ve crossed my 30’s, I feel like each week moves faster than the week before. One day it’s Monday and then I blink and it’s suddenly Friday afternoon.

It feels like the second half of my 20’s simply flew by in a few months.

To combat this constant chaos, I’m focusing on trying to be more reflective every week and every day.

When you slow down and take a second to look back, this is the only way I have found to slow down the world. (Outside of long vacations, but I don’t do those nearly enough.)

The daily review

Each day I ask myself a few questions:

What wins did I have today? What went well?
What was a memorable moment?
What could I do better tomorrow to make it an even better day?
What relationships in my life do I need to give more attention?
What 3 things am I grateful for today?

When you first start doing it, it feels weird to analyze a day in such detail. However, when you’re going back and flipping through your notebook, it’s amazing to read.

You’ll remember little details you completely forgot in the daily speed of life. It also reminds you that you often have a pretty good life.

Yes, you could make the argument that by focusing on the good things every day, you’re glossing over the tough things that happened, but do you really want to look back and remember all the pain and heartache? I sure don’t.

The weekly review

My weekly reviews are a little more in-depth and tied to my work life.

Highlights of the week?
What didn’t go right this week?
What worked this week?
What projects did I move forward?
How can I move them forward next week?
What can I do to have a better week next week?
What am I looking forward to?
An overview of the top areas and goals I care about and what’s happening with them.
Top 5 goals for next week.

For my monthly reviews, I generally ask the same questions. It’s surprisingly hard to review a full month without these daily and weekly reviews. I have no idea how someone could review a month without the detailed notes from the other reviews.

Extra benefits of reviewing your life regularly

One of the biggest benefits I saw after a few weeks of maintaining this review schedule was the fact that I could see pitfalls in my planning and where I was making mistakes.

It’s so easy to get caught up in the day-to-day grind that you forget to take a step back and look for new, fresh solutions.

We often do these types of reviews at our jobs but rarely think to do them for our lives. Which is funny because our lives are far more important than our jobs.

When you’re reviewing your life, you’re able to be more intentional about your time. If you’re repeatedly saying that you don’t put in enough time for friends and family, you’ll be determined to figure out how to make it fit in.

You’ll also be able to see where you’re making progress and where you’re falling behind on other things. This will force you to re-evaluate if those goals are important to you. If not, you’ll finally be able to let them go. If they are, you’ll be forced to figure out a way to fit them in.

Only through reflection can we figure out what truly matters and make sure we don’t miss it in the hustle and bustle of our speedy lives.

How to Fix Your Boring Life and Make Life More Exciting

Jackie1 Comment

Life goes through cycles. Sometimes it’s exciting and sometimes it’s mundane.

However, if most of us aren’t careful we’ll end up in a life that feels too much like Groundhog Day where every single day feels like the same.

This is a problem I constantly find myself in, even though I own my own business and control my own schedule.

It’s easy to get comfortable. To stay within the walls of what you know. To stop reaching out. But a quality life is outside of that realm.

Yes, there’s something to be said for that inner happiness and peace that comes with being content with your life (another article for another day), but excitement is what gets us jumping out of bed in the morning.

If you find yourself in a position where you hate getting out of bed in the morning, or everything just feels tedious, you’re probably stuck in a rut. (Also – I’m not talking about dealing with depression, that’s a whole different beast.)

This is purely about shaking things up and bringing your spark back.

See, this is something I had a huge awakening to last year.

Since I started my business in 2012, I got stuck in workaholic mode. My weekends and days were dedicated to sitting at my computer and doing everything I could to bring in work. This went on for years and lead to bad habits that I should have started to break years ago.

Then, last year, I started dating someone fun who got me out of this rut. We’d explore the city, watch movies, laugh, and I wouldn’t work for a whole weekend at a time.

You’d think that my work would have suffered due to cutting down my working hours, but the opposite was actually true. I actually ended up making more money.

While that relationship didn’t last, the lasting impact of getting outside of my daily rut did. It’s so easy to get caught up in the day to day life that we simply forget to step back and analyze if all this work is getting us closer or farther from the things we actually want. That brings me to my first point.

Get in touch with what you want

You probably have put off the things you want for far too long now. Sometimes we can be so focused on the daily grind and to-do’s that we forget the long-term view of our lives.

If you’ve been wanting to write a screenplay, but you haven’t written a page in a year, it’s time for you to decide if you truly want it or if you don’t.

Another thing to note: It’s okay to let go of goals.

I wanted to be a professional snowboarder as a teenager and it took me far too long to admit to myself that I was over that goal and it was something I no longer wanted.

Take the time to list out what you actually want out of your life. What do you want for the next 10 years to look like? Get detailed.

Until you know where you want to go, you’ll have no idea how to mix it up.

Imagine life without taking action

It’s easy to sit here and say, “Oh, it’s easy, just start!”

I hate the “just start!” advice. It’s shallow. Yes, it’s that simple but it’s not that easy.

So instead I want you to actually visualize what it would be like if you don’t take action on these things you want. Imagine being older, being sick, nearing the end of your life without having pursued the things you want.

Note: I said pursued. Achievements are hard and sometimes wildly subjective, but it’s the pursuit of goals that give us fulfillment.

If you ask anyone who is older than you, it’s always the things they didn’t do that hurts the most. Rarely do they regret trying new things, even if they were bad at them.

Find a reason

To propel yourself to take action and get out of your head, you’ll have to find a reason to start.

Maybe this means paying for classes (paying for something is a big motivator). Maybe you start a blog to track your progress. Do whatever it takes to start now, not later.

Switch up your daily routine

Call into work sick if you have to, but for one day this week you need to do something you don’t regularly do. If you have kids, get a babysitter. If you have appointments, move them.

I can’t emphasize how important it is to get outside of your regular environment. If you cancel everything and just stay home, you’ll end up internet surfing or playing video games all day which is the opposite of what you need.

If you want to take it to the next level, go on a weekend trip away. However, that’s not possible for everyone. You need to remember life outside of your daily bubble. Life before all your damn productivity systems yelling at you every day.

You don’t even need to spend money on this day. You could go walk around a local park or simply work at your local library. Whatever it takes to just shake up your inner robot.

Try something new outside of what you think you like

If you don’t think you’re athletic, follow a YouTube video of a beginner yoga session.

If you don’t like spicy foods, try just one food that is slightly spicy.

The problem with life and social media is that we stick ourselves in these boxes, and then other people expect us to stay in these boxes. We put pressure on ourselves and so do the people around us to stay the same. You haven’t tasted enough things to know what you like and what you don’t like.

You’re bored because you’re bored with the current version of yourself and your life. You want different things but are worried the people around you won’t like it.

You have no idea what could eventually become a passion or side hobby until you taste it and know. Don’t let people hold you back from these possibilities.

Doing things that scare you (even a little bit) is the best way to feel alive. That doesn’t mean you have to go skydiving (although it can), it just means doing things outside of what we view as possible in our own lives.

Start cutting

If you seriously want to change your life, you need to start cutting out the things that don’t add to it.

I don’t believe in cutting out things that actually bring you joy (someone will remove watching horror movies out of my weekly list over my cold, dead body), but you need to know what those things are.

If you’re watching sports just because you always did in the past but you’re finding that it doesn’t actually bring you a renewed sense of focus, then it’s time for it to go.

You’d be surprised at how many things are on your list that you do every day simply out of routine or expectations from other people. You’ll have to start saying no so you can fit in what matters.

Start cutting so you can start adding what matters most.

It’s only your life on the line.

Thoughts on Legacy, Tombstones, and Death

JackieLeave a comment

Death is a morbid topic to think about.

But if you’re going to create a life you want, you’re going to have to think about it.

My problem at every “job” I’ve ever had is that eventually I think about “If I were to die tomorrow, would I want this to be the last thing I did with my life?”

If the answer screamed from my bones: “NO” then I put in my two week notice the next day. Sometimes I had something else lined up, sometimes I didn’t. Most people look at me like I am insane, but I’m okay with that.

Because all I can think about at any given moment is my legacy.

“Is this what I want to be remembered for?”

I’ve gotten much better at narrowing it down and sticking to certain paths as time goes on, but I still think about it all the time.

As some of you know, I am a copywriter at the moment. I love it. It feels great to help people find the right words to describe their business. I’m happy and my clients are happy.

Is it what I want to always be remembered for?

Nope.

It will be a nice addition to the list, but it won’t be the only thing. I can’t personally imagine my obituary reading, “She was great at helping other people sell things.”

I think often of F. Scott Fitzgerald, my favorite author of all time, who never personally recovered from his success of The Great Gatsby. I am not envious of his life. If you ever read about it, it is quite sad. He was a terrible alcoholic, he was plagued with insecurities, he died at the young age of 44, and his wife died in a fire in a mental hospital.

Then on the flip side, I think of Theodore Roosevelt. Not only was he a President of the United States, but he was also an explorer, soldier, author, cowboy, police commissioner, started the Rough Riders, governor, vice president, wilderness enthusiast, Harvard graduate, boxer, rower, and certified badass. At one point in his career, he was shot in the chest and still continued speaking in front of the crowd for 90 minutes. And he did all of that before the age of 60. Not to mention, he wrote and published 35 books… AND had the famous Teddy bear named after him. Just let all of that soak in for a minute.

Throughout my short 24 years so far, every now and then I get friends who ask me how to decide what they want to do with their lives. I definitely don’t have all the answers yet, but there are some things I know for sure:

1. Progression is everything.

You grow in life or you stagnate. There is no middle ground here. You’re either growing as a person, getting in shape, making money, traveling and seeing the world, or you’re just sitting still.

If you focus on continual growth, you don’t have to worry as much about a “career” or a “job”. You will continue to pursue opportunities where growth will happen. You can’t always plan a “career”, but you can focus on your values, virtues, and goals as a person which will help you spot the opportunities.

2. If you can die without doing x, y, and z, move on from it.

Sometime we get so much outside influence for how we should think that we completely lose touch with ourselves. It takes a lot of alone time to clear out the clutter, voices, and suggestions from well-meaning people.

For example:
– Since I have a writing degree and student loan debt, I always feel like pursuing anything outside of writing is a waste of $20,000.00. Then I remember that most people don’t actually stay in the degree they got in college.
– I always feel like being an entrepreneur is crazy and I should just get a job like everyone else. Then I remember that owning my own business is what I always wanted and that every single person I know in my immediate circle who talks a big game about owning their own business in a few years actually won’t. Entrepreneurship is something that courses through your veins and it isn’t something you can ignore because there is no other option.

Something I like to imagine is being 90 and asking myself, “If I don’t do this in my life, can I die happy?”

If you can die happy without owning a fancy car, then get rid of that from your goal list.
If you can die happy without becoming a manager/executive at x company, then stop pursuing it.
If you can die happy without living in another country, stop thinking you have to do that.

If you can’t imagine dying without having started your own company, start one.
If you can’t imagine dying without having children, then add that to your list.
If you can’t imagine dying without having seen Italy, then make sure you buy a plane ticket.

It might require a weekend away from TV, Internet, and other people to really think about what you want out of life. You’ll probably be shocked by how many things you don’t want in your life.

Whatever the answers are, make the plans and adjust your life accordingly. Not all of us get until we are 90, so make sure you start on a path you actually want sooner than later.